Monday, March 22, 2010

Hello Kitty Congress

botox pelosi
Vampires don't sleep

Last night, when all decent folk were at home getting ready for bed, Nancy Pelosi and her Botox Agents of Smoke and Change successfully shoved another socialist entitlement down the throats of the American people against the clearly expressed wishes of the majority. As she was doing so she said "this will end the insurance industry treating being a woman as a pre-existing condition." It was such a blatantly false statement that it nearly left me speechless. I took all of 15 seconds to catch my breath and shout, "fucking cuuuunt".

Yes, we've had exclusively female-focused tax-payer funded medical research in the U.S. for the past 15 years thanks to the Women's Health Act of the 1990s with nothing even remotely similar for men. Even prior to this, female-focused medical research was more heavily funded than male-focused. And irony of ironies, it has been the documented crisis of primarily females abusing and overusing their health insurance-covered access to doctors (i.e. frequent unnecessary visits) that has been one of the significant causes of medical costs skyrocketing in the United States over the past 20-30 years. This is fact, but a politically unpopular fact that both Democrats and Republicans won't touch with a ten-foot pole out of fear of an outraged response from female voters who dislike hearing anything unflattering that pertains to them. It is a fact that has many very well-understood reasons relating to evolution and reproduction which have nothing to do with slamming on women, but nevertheless remains true.

But a raging sociopath and filthy rich narcissist like Nancy Pelosi never lets The Truth get in the way of grabbing Power, or an opportunity to bitch and moan about how horrible it is to be a woman, even though she is currently the most powerful woman in the entire world. How depressing that is, knowing that no matter how much power, wealth, and control women like Nancy Pelosi have, there will never be an end to the bitching, and mostly about shit that isn't even true.

You're familiar

Then again, Harry Reid is a huge bitch, too, although he also bitches about how hard it is being a woman, so apparently when Men of the Left become bitches they truly become bitches and lose their manhood entirely. I wouldn't be at all surprised if Harry Reid dropped his pants on CSPAN and showed the world that he has no dick and is damned proud of it. He's a gigantic vagina.


Good Vagina

I'm not talking about the good kind of vagina, either, as in "Kim Kardashian's vagina is smokin' hot." I'm talking about the flappy, saggy, drippy, fish-smelling kind like Madeline Albright has, dry as a bone and just as useless except for the constant dripping of urine into her Depends adult diapers. That's Harry Reid in a nutshell. And Al Franken. And Joe Biden. And Barack Obama. And so many American politicians, in fact. I think it's only a matter of time before all the male Democrats in Congress, and a great many of the male Republicans, begin wearing pink dresses as a way of symbolizing that they renounce their mythical "male privilege" and are truly very sorry to have ever been born with penises at all.

guy in dress
Democrat-controlled Congress

Maybe I should start a political campaign to try and push them to actually do this? I'll call it the "Surrender Your Penis for Women's Empowerment" campaign and use lots of guilt and bullshit to pressure them by bitching and moaning about how the richest and most powerful people in the history of the world, American women, have it super duper hard and all "have a right to be angry." I'll write lots of editorials to the New York Times moaning that how the only way the men in Congress can show their commitment to women's "empowerment" is to renounce their own (very questionable) manhood and wear pink Hello Kitty dresses every day for the next 2 years. And then I'll sign my letters "Susan Sarandon."

Certain members of Congress would have no trouble with the Hello Kitty pink dress wearing at all, as some of them have been privately cross-dressing for their entire adult lives anyway.


Bad Vagina



A lot of conservative Republican voters are upset today. Pelosi's House shoved the government takeover of health care down the throats of The People despite the overwhelming cry from every single state of "we The People reject this and do not want it." The Senate did it before and all that remained was for the House to merge their bill with the Senate's and then send it to President Obama, who has never even read it, but guaranteed he'll sign it into law. That is happening as I write this.

All I can say to the depressed and screaming Republicans is, "what the fuck have you been doing throughout the past, what ... 50 years or more, ... that you didn't see all of this shit coming? Beginning back before most of us were even born, all of this has been openly planned and discussed and laid out in detail in books and articles and lectures and movies and TV shows, etc, etc, again and again, all through the '60s and '70s and never stopped even when Ronald Reagan was President and communism was supposedly on the run, through the '90s with great assistance from the Clinton White House, all during the Bush White House with willing cooperation from most Republican Senators until here we are today. Hell, a lot of this Marxist takeover shit was even openly promoted in propaganda on kids TV shows, so I know even the most mentally challenged had every opportunity to prepare for battle and get busy fighting long before it came to this.

Well, whatever. Just wait until the bill for this hits the paychecks of every single American citizen, Democrat and Republican alike. Wait until you hear the cries of "I can't afford this!" If you think the American economy is in the shitter now, just wait until tomorrow.


Our current economic policy


As for me, I'm watching this party with a drink in one hand and the bottle in the other and the full knowledge that I've done what I can do and will continue to do so. Whatever the outcome of this shit I'm going to keep fighting for what I consider important, and I hope you'll do the same. That's all you can do. Just don't be caught sitting on your ass in front of the TV complaining about shit when you didn't even try to do anything one way or the other.


Damn, somebody needs to do something





"Après moi le déluge"



Get up and fight or shut the fuck up.

25 comments:

unique_stephen said...

The were voted in with health care on their platform ...


opps - I'll go back to being a mix of number 4 and 6 from your last post..

unique_stephen said...

no scrap that - I'm a mix of 5 and 7 (and I can't count)

Memphis Steve said...

Unique, once people saw what they were doing an overwhelming majority flooded their offices with calls making it clear that this was not what they wanted. They know a huge percentage of their own former supporters are fuming over this. They ignored the clearly stated will of the people for their own personal "holy grail." It's "ends justifies the means" all over again. They always do this shit. But then, everyone voting here should know that by now.

Memphis Steve said...

Unique, mix of 5 and 7? 4 and 6? I'm going to have to go back and look. I can't remember what I wrote.

Memphis Steve said...

Unique, a dry toast asshole? Man, you'd have to meet these people before you said that. Seriously, you might want to hold off on comparing yourself to them. We all have our problems, but these two have some big ones. Maybe I'll get to Sydney and we can have a beer and then I'll tell you if you're even close, eh? :)

Heff said...

Excellent post !

Pelosi is an IDIOT.

Well, so is Kim Kardashian, but who the fuck cares ?

Catch Her in the Wry said...

You're always at your best when you're angry and on your soapbox. So funny and yet so true.

xl said...

I'm only in it for myself anymore. And I only care about (a) restoring the value of my retirement account (b) restoring the value of the US dollar vs the Oz dollar. Otherwise, fuck it.

Senorita said...

There was a lot of snatch mentioning going on in that post.

Memphis Steve said...

Heff, Kim Kardashian at least runs a business and has to deal with a certain level of fiscal reality associated with that. Pelosi is just living in la la land, up in the Botox suburbs. Honest to God, I think the Kardashians would be better in Congress than Pelosi and Reid. Bruce Jenner might even make a decent President.

CatchHer, it's funny that Pelosi's bullshit statement about the pre-existing condition is what made me mad. The other shit I was fully anticipating.

XL, I'm with you there. Hey, maybe you need a roommate in Oz? If we're going socialist anyway I think I'd rather do it on the beach in the Land Down Under.

Senorita, any excuse to post a photo of Kim Kardashian in all her hotness is worthwhile to me. Actually this entire post was just a pretext for that. ;)

Just telling it like it is said...

Power to the people...(as I pump my fist in the air)

Just telling it like it is said...

dry as toast = sexual problems

dr.alistair said...

it`s pretty bad when bruce jenner seems like a viable alternative.

Memphis Steve said...

TellIt, see, now you're confusing me. I was talking about a dry as toast personality, but I'm thinking you migiht be talking about the vagina issue, or lack thereof, eh? And power to the people indeed! We need to take back our power.

DrA, considering some of the political hacks we call 'leaders' in this country I think he'd be a reasonable candidate. Hell, Al Franken is in the Senate and he's a damn clown.

Red Shoes said...

Hi there, Steve.. it was a bummer to see/hear that Alex Chilton died... sucks...

As for Pelosi and her ilk...they did what they said they were going to do... and it scares me that she had said that the bill would have to be passed to further learn what is in it... I fear we don't know anything yet...

Health care reform was needed... this bullshit??? nope....

~shoes~

Stormin said...

Just depressing that people elected the morons currently there only because they were upset about Bush and the Republicans... Only to find out that what was waiting on the other side of the road was truly disgusting.

Without something to stop this bill we are all screwed. Even with something, the lawsuits are going to take a decade to figure out anyways.

MauserMedic said...

Holy shit, post a warning before putting that picture at the top of your post!

But now that I'm over the shock, I'm really impressed that someone found a way to make the turd even uglier. It's like you can see her true self shining through.......

Barefoot Dreamer said...

I used to sell insurance and I can tell you exactly why a majority of these people were uninsurable - you watch... this will be a disaster. There will be a flux of people hitting the clinic/hospitals/and surgical wards getting every hemorrhoid, mole, and lack of half a brain fixed - it will back the system up and it will cost a gazillion trillion bagoogle amount of monies. Sigh. Yes, people should be able to get help - but come on!

I dont even know what I am saying - just ranting really. I will shut up now and just go back to looking pretty.

fingers said...

Oh stop panicking you fascists !!!
You can afford universal health care...just keep emptying your jails to balance the budget.
Reduce life sentences to a year and you're halfway there already...

Wondering Woman said...

I'm so mad steam has been coming out of my ears all day and reading your post made me feel like I'd actually gotten to punch some of those insane politicians in person. Been doing my taxes on TurboTax and it says in 2010 we'll pay Medicare tax on any investment income we have, dividends, interest, capital gains. Here it comes...... and fast.

Memphis Steve said...

RedShoe, I actually didn't realize that he had died. Yes, Pelosi didn't see what the problem was with her statement that we'd have to pass it into law before she'd let us know what it said. That's how she thinks, though, and she's so dysfunctional that she thinks it's OK.

Stormin, we are in a mess. The Republicans have become so incredibly corrupt and useless that they were knowingly betraying and screwing their own voter base, and they expected to keep on getting away with it. Meanwhile, the Democrats have been hijacked by the most radical Marxists our country has ever seen and nothing seems able to stop them, especially as long as they have so many billionaires funding their war on individual rights and freedom.

MauserMed, hell, she's on every news channel all the time anyway. I thought it'd be like the Exorcist, after seeing it a few times it's less scary.

Barefoot, that's what I was talking about up in the first part of my post. The abuse of health care jacked it up, but the fact is, a huge portion of those without insurance simply didn't want it. They went to the doctor when they needed to and paid for it themselves and were happy doing that.

Fingers, we don't have the trillions this is going to cost. Contrary to what California seems to think, America actually doesn't have unlimited money. As for our jails and judicial system, that whole mess is a different story. If we needed to 'reform' anything it is our judicial system and law enforcement, not our health care. "Tough on crime" has become a buzzword for "convict the innocent and guilty alike."

WonderWoman, yep, steal from the rich, the middle class and the poor as well, and spend it all on bloated matriarchal bureaucracy, political pay-offs and vote-buying bullshit. When the money runs out, just print more! Of course, we knew this was who was being elected even before the election, so it isn't as if America can claim ignorance. We knew what this fucker was.

Ute said...

Brad Pitt is damn sexy, no matter what he wears. ;o)


Ps... I know that's not got nuffin' to do with the post..but hey, you posted his pic, so there. :op

Memphis Steve said...

Ute, hey, I aim to please. I only wrote this as an excuse to post a picture of Kim Kardashian's fine assets.

rage said...

Harry Ried=douche

Nancy P=bitch

I think I am not alone when I say that they both need to be bitch slapped.

The picture of that cat is freaking hilarious.

Memphis Steve said...

Rage, all of Washington could use a good hard bitch-slapping.

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